Friday, July 7, 2023

water blues


good title.  water blues. debated typing "water bluz."  "Is it too subtle," I said to myself.  Note the color of this print.  too subtle?

My house has a strange quirk.  When you turn on the water hose, you hear this high pitched sound throughout the house.  On the good side, the noise helps me remember to shut off the spigots.  Really strange - not a hammering that you often hear in older homes, but  a high pitch sorta moan.  Oh well.

I am assuming that it is caused by small pipes and too much water pressure.  Am NOT going to tear out all my pipes and redo the whole house.  "Live with it," I say.


I stay up fairly late messin' with the computer and watching TV by myself.  Nothing is ever accomplished.  It is what I do & have done since I could choose my own bedtime.  In my younger teaching days, I'd stay up watching Johnny Carson while I typed and prepared for the next school day.  It is what I did...and do.

Thus, being retired, my preference is to sleep late - maybe 9 or 9:30.  What else is there to do?

This morning at - say - 6:35 or so - my wife rolled out and went into the bathroom.  Don't know why that woke me up.  I looked at clock and turned back over.  (Remember I am close to deaf without hearing aids - I don't hear everything.)

As I started to doze, I heard the fan in the bathroom turn on.  That's something since I rarely hear the fan running when I am standing in there.  A minute or so later, the wife walks out of the room and asks what that noise is.  That Noise Is?  I rolled my eyes still hidden behind the sleeping eyelids.  Huh? Oh?  What? Sure?  Do what?

The fear hit me.  What is that noise?  Oh no, the Air Conditioner motor is going out.  Boy it is loud.  I squirreled out of bed, put on the house shoes, and shuffled blindly into the bathroom.  It wasn't the fan.  The noise got louder as I neared the water closet  ( a cute name for the toilet hidden behind a door ).  I know, some neighbor must be  running a big machine outside.  It sounded like an enormous compressor - a machine grinding away at space...The fear continued.  I looked at the ceiling.

The air cond unit runs down the middle of the house in the attic.  I moved towards the L.R. & made sure the A.C. was turned off.  It made no difference to the sound.  On to the other side of the house.  The sound diminished.  Why?   I was standing right under the A.C.  no sound.  Moving to the front door, the sound increased slightly.  I opened the front door and walked around to the outside A.C. unit.  Quiet and Still.  nothing there.  This makes no sense.  

A quick trip to the garage, pull down the ladder, and climb into the attic.  It was so quiet I could have paused for a relaxing nap.  So, it is not the A.C. -  ??? that was a question mark ???  Back to the bedroom, "wham bang" it was still crunching loudly along.  I don't understand.  one last thing.

I opened the back door.  Maybe a neighbor out back was running a pool cleaning service or helicopter landing pad.   Then, I saw it.

(at this point I should pause for a commercial.  since I have nothing to sell, we go on)

The spigot on the back of the house outside the bedroom window was spewing water,  It was where the water hose connected to the spigot - y'know, one of those government mandated attachments to keep water from going back into the house pipes.   Water spewing.  I trudged over and turned off the water faucet - the noise stopped.

We have a water hose attached which waters the garden if you turn on the timer and the faucet.  My daughter had turned it on as she went to work.  It should have shut off and BEEN QUIET.  It didn't.  I do not understand the pipes in this house. What a noise.

By now I am awake.  Going back to bed was an option; then, my wife said, "I can't find my phone."  I gave it up - look for a lengthy nap in the p.m. hours.

I wish you could have heard the noise.  I'm asking for all you profession, semi-professionals, and amateur plumbers to lend me your expertise.  Best plan?  Sell the house, and start over.  Maybe, don't water the garden at 6 a.m.

more later [or not],


No comments:

Post a Comment