Tuesday, July 19, 2016

Paranoia - Walmart shopping

My blog tells me I have had 57,500 + views.  Really.   Sure, they are worth it.  Just ask me; I'll tell ya.  57,500+ views.  Keep reading.  This one is okay.
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I went to town today, Tuesday.  My Timex had quit ticking.  It took some licks, and didn't keep ticking...Yuk Yuk - ticks me off.
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The Wrist Watch Stone first:   Back when I retired in 2004 we had our final spring concert in Manor.  It was an okay concert - good crowd .... regulars, you might say.  At the end of the concert the Band Boosters presented me a retirement / going away gift /  a very nice wrist watch.  It really was.   I was pleased to be remembered.

Inscribed on the back was a phrase which I often used -  my administration hated it with a fervor -  "Don't do stupid things."  I could have said "Do smart things ."  The Adm. would have liked that.   But this is not what you'd expect from me.  The students understood.  Only the M.S. administration had a problem.  Of course, that relationship was a bit strained anyway.  ( a stone for another day-or it may be inside of a previous bluggy )
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At the end of the concert, I sat on the edge of the stage greeting well-wishers, giving hugs, that sorta thing.  I took the new watch out and put it on my left wrist as I removed my old, well-used Timex.   At that exact moment, the Timex broke.  It was as if the Timex knew its days were numbered and "wham," the little arms that hold on the wrist band, they snapped off.   Prophetic.  Truly, it was the end of my era - and of that Timex.
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Over time, I bought a new Timex to use when I am mowing, painting, working, whatever.   This week my Timex quit.  It may be the battery; or, it could be the hole in the crystal and the fact that I was washing out our rain gutters.  Water can be a demon at times.
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So, I went to town for another Timex, one that was ticking.  Corsicana has Walmart.   I bought my new watch, picked up some vitamins for the wife, and bought some gas treatment for the Marauder.  It was 3:30ish when I left.   
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I have been carrying a sack of papers for 2 months.  These need to go into my safety deposit box.   I arrived at the bank at 3:34 - saw they were open till 4 - (a surprise - always thought banks closed at 2) - went in - took care of biz - returned to my car and began to set the time on the new Timex.
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Nobody was parked near me at the time.   I notice a small SUV pull in beside me as I struggled with the time piece.  Deciding to fight it later, I looked up and out my driver's window.  There was a young guy in the white SUV with his cell phone pointed straight at me.  Strange.  He was early 20s dark hair with a small Hitler style mustache.  Strange.  Why is he taking my picture?
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I quickly started the car and backed out.  I headed to the end of the block and made a right turn noticing that the white SUV backed out and followed me to the first corner.  Nobody had gone into the bank.  Apparently they pulled in beside me just to take my picture.  Strange skinny Hitler guy...
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The SUV was a block behind me and travelling parallel, going east on 3rd street as I went east on 4th.  At the next corner, I turned north  to be pointed in their direction.  They had stopped at that corner waiting, WAITING.  I pulled over to the curb and paused.  Eventually, they drove forward (east) slowly.  I moved north to 3rd street and looked to the right at the back of their car.   It was parked catty-corner at the next intersection - directly in front of the court house.  It was not moving.
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I drove slowly north looking over my shoulder.  Immediately they moved east again to the next corner.  I hurried my pace for two blocks and made a quick right turn east.  At the next stop sign, I could see them on the curb facing my direction.  Strange.  They were just standing there (car standing, not parked).  Deciding this was too strange, I made another quick block east and whipped into a parking lot, reversed my direction, and moved 2 blocks west, turning south for another 3 blocks.
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I sat and looked in the mirror.  Nothing.  No white SUV shadowing me.
Now, folks, normally, I am not a paranoid person.  People are not out to get me.  But this was strange.  When I turned, they turned.  When I stopped at the end of a block, they stopped at the end of their block.  What is going on?  What in the world had I done to get their interest peaked?  TAKE MY PICTURE OUT  YOUR WINDOW!!!
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Free; Free at Last; I drove home watching the mirrors  --- nothing.   I told my wife when I got home.  Was someone following me, or was it just a strange coincidence?   
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An hour passed at home.  I fed the dogs.   I took a bucket of aluminum cans to our can crusher in the garage, crushing.
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BOING!!!!!
BOOOIIIIINNNNNGGGGG!!!!!
It hit me like a ton of bricks.
An Epiphany!!!
A Revelation!!!
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Have you figured it out yet?
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I was NOT being followed.
NOBODY pulled in beside me and took my picture.
They WEREN'T observing me as they waited at each corner for my appearance.
Nope.
NONE of that.
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I had been Pokemoned.  ( a new term just invented for the explanation )  I have been "POKEMONED."
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The guy wasn't taking my photo; he was capturing a Pokemon.
They weren't going slow at the corners because of me, they were hunting a Pokemon.
[ The court house apparently has some nearby. ]
I was paranoid.   Frankly, I was insignificant to these people.  They didn't care about me or the Marauder or going to the bank or anything else -- No!!!
They were seeking a Pokemon.
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AS AN ASIDE HERE -- what if I were a paranoid schizophrenic?  One who thinks he is being followed by the CIA or Russian Spies?  What if?   And what if I had been carry my sub-machine gun on the front seat?  There would have been a mess on the streets of Corsicana.
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With Love, I say
go Pokemon go
m3
You have my permission to make fun of me.

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